^Amos did not appreciate his feeding tube one bit. It was a real struggle to try to keep it taped down to his face so that he would not pull it out, and eventually he emerged the victor. He grabbed a hold of that thing and yanked a good twelve inches of it out his nose from down in his stomach. Thankfully, it seems he retained the good talk he and I, dear old Dad, had about cause and effect, and he has started eating much better on his own. He is taking formula with regularity, and he is even letting Mom feed him real baby food too. This is a real relief to Mom and I because the doctors are allowing us to forego the feeding tube as long as he stays on top of eating on his own.
^Pictured above, Amos and Mom catch a nap as we are going on week number two living in the hospital room. This morning both Christine and I kind of started to feel the effects of the longer term grind of it all. The initial emotions are subsiding a bit, and even though we are still at the beginning of all this the nature of just how long and how much our lives are changing as a result is starting to become a reality.
^Amos finds comfort in reading books with Mom and watching his favorite monkey, Curious George. Mom seems just as into it as Amos is I think. Christine is the rock for Amos. Amos is a total Momma's boy, and she is rising to the task. She can comfort him like nothing else. Although I am good for fun when he wants to play, it is all about Mom. I am doing my best to be the best "GoFer" I can be for him and Christine, but it has been tough for me because Amos just can't do the things that he and I were really growing into enjoying together. Before he became sick Amos and I were really getting a lot of time together during Christine's work day because I work nights and could spend a lot of days with him. Since he had grown out of being a newborn we were just really starting to get a lot of play time and going on hikes in the mountains together with our best buddy, Murphy, our golden retriever. Last night it was really weighing on me that I really just miss my little boy. He was really starting to come into his own and growing into the boy I had envisioned he would be. He was beginning to love hanging with me and Murphy in the backyard, in the garage, and on hikes in his baby boy backpack in the mountains. He was coming into his own. Now he has shut down somewhat. He is not the bouncing happy boy squawking at Dad from the backpack and yanking on my sunglasses as we venture through the creeks, cliffs, and pathways of the mountains. He needs his Mom in a big way these days and Dad's role is just not as useful to him in his current state. I am doing my best to simply be the best go-to guy for Christine in helping with all the tasks she needs to keep him comfortable. I can't hold him as much, and he is very stoic even when he does feel like playing with his toys and Dad. So for now I just focus on getting down to the business of support, and I simply try to keep an eye to the future when he is back to the bouncing boy who hoots and hollers from behind me while tugging on my sunglasses from in his favorite spot riding in his backpack in the warm sunshine of bluebird mornings in the hills. I take solace that it will be all that much more special when we finally get back to our backyard play time, our best buddy Murphy, and our timeless adventures in the mountains all over again.
